So another cycle is coming upon us...the season of fall is right around the corner with its beautiful auburn colors slowly taking over the muted greens of summer. For me the ancient tune of "School days, School days...dear ol' golden rule days" rings a bell but this semester will be much different then any other for it is finally my LAST...YEEPEE!!!. So not only will I be graciously humming the tune of "reading, writing, and arithmetic" but also reflecting upon my achievements and also of course my setbacks. I think I will grow another two full inches with the 21 credits I am now registered for and also the determination I have growing inside of me to KICK MAJOR BUDDHA LUSCIOUS ASS for my final performance as a undergraduate. I am so excited and really just cannot wait to get this started. But now I wonder how I am going to feel once it is all over...most definitely a little scared, a little sad, and maybe just a tiddie bit relieved. I think fear will be the majority as I am now taking a tiny turn on the yellow brick road that I have become so comfortable with. Just when you think you know where you are going, where those short cuts are, and how to give directions to those who are only just beginning....it changes on you, or do you change...CHICKEN EGG CHICKEN
EGG CHICKEN EGG?!?!?
I also have my move to Seattle at the end of December which the very thought of it gives me chills and has kept me up many of nights lately. So close yet far enough away that I really cannot make the preparations necessary which I think is what is driving me up the wall the most. Gee whiz Batman...a major move across the country and all I can really do now is NOTHING but wait. Wait to see whether or not I will be accepted into AmeriCorps, wait to see what room I can rent for cheap, wait to see how I am going to move all my things, and wait to decide what I shall take. Hmm, do you think it is economically rational to move my queen size bed across country? Futon comes to mind in this age of convenience cheap luxury where being uncomfortable is more fashionable and more efficient:( And what about my poor Alex...do I make the selfish decision of taking her with me and parting her away from my grandfather and her routines, her familiar smells, her home? Is her home with her "mommy" or is her place with my grandfather so he is not terribly lonely? Do I take everything away from my grandfather that is important to him? Is this what "spreading your wings" entails?
On a side note here is a little excerpt on a annoyance of mine. As I am sitting here typing, I just realize that I only have one more ciggie left and it is now 12:43am. Do I run to the store or do I remain a good girl, a healthy human being...and forget about smoking for the rest of the night? This is not the first time that this has happened, and I hate to admit...but I usually give in to the Marlboro Man and make that run to 7-11 at 1:00am only to be greeted by the friendly Persian man who also knows my addiction so well that he has my junk laid out on the counter all set for me to purchase as soon as he sees my car pull in. I just now complained my little situation to a friend on-line who replied," No, have a carrot instead"...how phallic!!!!! *Giggles*
Alrighty superheroes and villians...it is time for us people who are just in-between to say nighty night.